Declan’s brief accompaniment did have Aoba wondering, in those moments before the shower glass went dark. It made him a whole new kind of self-conscious, but he wasn’t even sure if he should have been. They were both men, so neither one of them had anything that would surprise the other. Men didn’t have to be self-conscious of other men. Why would being romantically involved make that different? Should it? Was it only Desire that was wholly tickled by the idea of perhaps being watched, or was the proper reaction not to care at all, or should he just be modest and go along with whatever values Declan wanted to adhere by?
Then it was just plain strange, while he was actively showering, to hear Declan moving about past the noise of the running water. Aoba imagined he would jump, if the door were to suddenly open or the glass were to go transparent again. That was his—his partner out there. His…boyfriend? That seemed like too soft or informal a word for someone like Declan. So maybe just…his man? Not exactly his lover, at least, not until they actually got intimately physical, right?
But Desire behaved and so, thankfully, did his body itself. When the coast was clear he stepped out into the bunkroom proper, eyeing the remade bed with something like a sense of wonder as he put on drawstring sweatpants and a soft T-shirt, being not nearly so inclined to barechestedness as Declan was. But, that was a pretty permanent-looking arrangement. That comment Declan had made, about not holding each other at night…that was what they were going to do until the time came for Aoba to leave, wasn’t it? He didn’t mind it, but it still made his pulse race a bit, and that was very new to him.
Then Declan reappeared with the tray while Aoba was easing his towel-dried hair back into a ponytail, and he stopped short at the sweetly domestic image Declan managed to cut despite being such a well-built warrior. It was suddenly calming, reassuring, and heartwarming all at once.
The feeling of knowing you were loved, maybe?
“That’s…not one I know, no,” he managed as he came unpaused. “I think the movies you two like came a couple centuries ahead of me, at least.”
After some consideration, Aoba crawled into the prepared bunk, imagining he’d be more secure with the wall on one side and Declan to the other. Secure, but not trapped. Never that.
Once in place, he held out his hands for the loaded tray. “Let me hold that while you get in?”
no subject
Then it was just plain strange, while he was actively showering, to hear Declan moving about past the noise of the running water. Aoba imagined he would jump, if the door were to suddenly open or the glass were to go transparent again. That was his—his partner out there. His…boyfriend? That seemed like too soft or informal a word for someone like Declan. So maybe just…his man? Not exactly his lover, at least, not until they actually got intimately physical, right?
But Desire behaved and so, thankfully, did his body itself. When the coast was clear he stepped out into the bunkroom proper, eyeing the remade bed with something like a sense of wonder as he put on drawstring sweatpants and a soft T-shirt, being not nearly so inclined to barechestedness as Declan was. But, that was a pretty permanent-looking arrangement. That comment Declan had made, about not holding each other at night…that was what they were going to do until the time came for Aoba to leave, wasn’t it? He didn’t mind it, but it still made his pulse race a bit, and that was very new to him.
Then Declan reappeared with the tray while Aoba was easing his towel-dried hair back into a ponytail, and he stopped short at the sweetly domestic image Declan managed to cut despite being such a well-built warrior. It was suddenly calming, reassuring, and heartwarming all at once.
The feeling of knowing you were loved, maybe?
“That’s…not one I know, no,” he managed as he came unpaused. “I think the movies you two like came a couple centuries ahead of me, at least.”
After some consideration, Aoba crawled into the prepared bunk, imagining he’d be more secure with the wall on one side and Declan to the other. Secure, but not trapped. Never that.
Once in place, he held out his hands for the loaded tray. “Let me hold that while you get in?”